Which is better? Air-popped or Oil-Popped?

"Air-popped popcorn has only 31 calories per cup; oil-popped popcorn has only 55 calories per cup."

The Popcorn Board

Both taste good, but sometimes a matter of preference.  She has two kids.  One son and one daughter.  She says she didn't mean to stay in her first marriage as long as she did, but her son came along and could not leave what she started.  The second one, which is me was basically a last effort to try to keep the marriage together. 

She says that back then she was in such a hurry to get out of the house that she would've married anyone that her father approved.  But her intent was to just stay long enough to say she gave it a shot.  She wanted out of the "jail" home life she grew up in.  Her father was very particular as to who was going to marry his daughters.  Each of the stalk girls had to bring forward their future husbands to get approval.  Many were turned away and the ones that were approved, they ran with it.  Not all of the husbands were good husbands.  There has been some cases of infidelity, alcoholism, neglect and one unsure of his sexuality.  There has been some cases of physical and mental abuse.  And more than a pinchful of trust issues.

She was a virgin when she married my dad.  She said they didn't really talk about sex at home because it was forbidden.  Each stalk had to go out and figure out on their wedding night the whole deal about sex.  Now, you can't get the stalks to shut up about sex.  They pick the most inappropriate settings, like the dinner table to talk about sex.  Love it when we have sausage as part of a meal.  Anyway, she had no idea how to protect herself against pregnancy.  Of course, within months, she found herself pregnant. 

When she delivered her kids, my dad wasn't around.  Back then men weren't allowed in the delivery rooms.  Or he chose not to.  My mom told me that my dad was at work when I came out.  He wouldn't take a day off of work.

She had no idea on how to raise a child either.  Her mother always took care of the seedlings in the garden.  She was out playing sports before paying attention to child-rearing techniques.  She used to put milk and rice inside of baby bottles to make sure we were fed.  She used to give meat and rice to us at 3 months using her hands versus baby cereal from a spoon.  She would watch what her stalks did with their seedlings, but never really knew how to care for her own babies.  My dad did most of the raising.  To this day, my brother and I are amazed we are alive today from the stories she would tell us.

As a wife, in our culture, the wife always cooked and served the man.  I don't think any of the stalk's husbands today have ever taken a plate from the cupboard and actually served themselves.  At family gatherings, the stalks would be in line first to get a plate of food ready for their husbands. Next the stalks would line up again to feed the kids and finally if they had anything left, they would feed themselves.  If a husband or child needed seconds, the stalks would get up and get it before they could sit down and eat.  She always looks at me at family functions and tells me to get a plate for my husband.  I say, "He's a grown man, he can get what he wants."  She often looks embarrassed because she is worried what the other stalks would say about how she raised me.  But their seedlings would do the same as me.  That is definitely a duty that died off in the last frost.

But like old world countries, the boy child was the precious treasure.  Their mommas always spoiled them.  Some of them never had to help out around the house.  The girls had to learn to serve them as part of their eduction to womanhood.  I think that's why my mother played sports, just to be around that carefree world.  But she was often dragged home to help out and often burning dinners she was in charge of making for the family.

To this day she has this same favoritism towards my brother and my son.  She would cook up a storm and sit all day and wait for my brother to come and visit her.  For me, the one she lived with most of the time, never lifted a finger to help me clean, and very rarely cooked.  But I would be expected to cook and clean if my brother's presence was expected in "my" house.   Even if my brother said that he would have a holiday dinner at his house, my mom would cook from our house to take over to his house because he was so generous as to host the celebration.  Crazy. 

She also is the same with my children.  My son who is younger gets special treatment than my daughter.  It was hard to watch and the trigger of many arguments between her and I.  If my son did bad in school it was the teacher's fault, it was the other kids bothering him or the school itself.  Not the fact that my son has selective hearing on his own accord and tries to be the center of attention in school.  When it comes to my daughter, although she loves her, she gives her nothing but tough love.  My kids could be fighting on the living room floor, my son on top of my daughter, my mother would be screaming at the top of her lungs claiming its my daughter's fault.  When the kids come home from school, all she cares about is that my son has his food ready.  Or when she is grocery shopping, she will buy snacks for my son and fruit for my daughter because my daughter is a bigger frame than my son.  Very hurtful.  In her mind, she is doing what she thinks is right, but it hurts me to watch, let alone my teenage daughter to feel more insecure about herself.

So you see, its a matter of preference, no matter the cost, no matter the health benefits, one always dominates over the other.